A woman who survived the late-term abortion that killed her twin is sharing the story of how she forgave her birth mother. Led by faith, she wants others to know that there are options besides abortion and that no woman has to walk her path alone.
Claire Culwell, 34, is a national speaker and author of the memoir, “Survivor.” Originally from Austin, Texas, where she was adopted by ministry workers Warren and Barbara Culwell, 69 and 64, she now lives in Lindale, Texas, with her husband, David, and their children.
“I was born ten weeks prematurely weighing 3 pounds 2 ounces (approx. 1.41 kg),” Claire told The Epoch Times. “I was raised by a wonderful Christian couple ... they adopted both my sister, Rachel, and me from different birth mothers. They raised us in a loving, forgiving home where they lived out their faith and poured encouragement into our lives daily.”
‘Your Life is a Miracle’
After Claire’s birth, she was in the hospital for two months before she was released to her parents. Claire was born with dislocated hips and club feet that were corrected using hip harnesses, foot casts, and body casts in her first two years of life. She was a patient at the Texas Scottish Rite Hospital for Children in Dallas until the age of 18.
Claire and her sister always knew they were adopted, and Rachel’s adoption was open. After Rachel connected with her birth mother in 2008, Claire saw the strength of their connection and the gravity of Rachel’s mother’s sacrifice. She decided to search for her own birth mother with the help of her adoption agency, Deaconess Adoption and Pregnancy Services in Oklahoma City.
“Debbie Campbell, who worked in reunion services, happened to also be my birth mother’s caseworker 20 years before we began the search,” Claire said. “She was able to find her online through MySpace, and my birth mother, Tonya, agreed to meet me. I was thrilled!”
Tonya Glasby, 48, from Yale, Oklahoma, met Claire along with her parents and sister in Dallas in March 2009.
“I couldn’t believe how much we looked alike and acted alike, and I knew that I adored her,” Claire said. “I couldn’t wait to be able to connect with her more, one-on-one, and be able to really thank her for my life, so we set a second meeting up in Oklahoma ... in May 2009. I brought a gift with me and a card that said, ‘Thank you for choosing life for me.’ I was excited to give it to her.”
However, upon receiving the card, Tonya broke down and Claire didn’t know why.
Painful Regrets
Through her tears, Tonya shared her story. She told Claire that she had fallen pregnant with her at the age of 13, and her mother made a choice for her to get an abortion.At 20 weeks, Tonya had a D&E dismemberment abortion. However, doctors didn’t realize that Tonya was pregnant with twins, so only one baby was terminated during the procedure and thus Claire survived.
A few weeks later a second abortion attempt was made in Kansas. However, this time Tonya was turned away because her amniotic fluid was leaking. She was then taken to Deaconess in Oklahoma City where she stayed until she gave birth to Claire in March 1988.
Claire said: “[Tonya] remembers being alone, unheard, and scared. No one spoke to her or asked her what they could do to support her during her abortion, or during her delivery. Her mother made the choice for her to place me for adoption, and afterward, she had to go home and pretend like none of it ever happened. She cried because these decisions are her deepest and most painful regrets.”
Watching her birth mother relive her pain, a shocked Claire tried to process the news that she was an abortion survivor and a “twin-less twin.” But at that moment, she found it easy to forgive Tonya.
“[S]he was a victim in this situation too,” she said. “It was also easy to forgive because of how I was raised on forgiveness and faith. I knew this wasn’t an accident, because the faith I was raised on meant God always had a plan, and his plan was good.”
The Domino Effect
Claire’s faith gives her the conviction to believe that God is using her experience for good. Today, she shares her story and advocates for the rights of unborn babies nationwide.She said: “I believe women have the right to do what they want with their own bodies, but I believe that the baby’s body is not her body. The baby’s body is a separate human being inside of her body, with a separate set of DNA.”
Since she herself is a mother now, Claire is able to see the “domino effect of abortion.”
“If I hadn’t survived my birth mother’s abortion, my biological daughter wouldn’t exist, and none of my children would have a mother,” she said. “When we talk about abortion, we should look at the big picture and notice the generational impact that abortion has.”
Claire feels blessed to have lived to tell her tale and shares her story with “anyone who will listen.”
“My faith is the biggest part of what has helped me through the past decade of knowing the truth about my survival story,” Claire said.
She is also committed to helping ensure no woman feels alone, as her birth mother once did. There is a bounty of resources and support out there, she insists.
“No one has to walk alone, and women are all strong and capable of motherhood with the resources and support that is available to them,” said Claire, who thinks about her lost twin often.
“I realized a few years ago that every time I look in the mirror, I am looking at my twin. That made it real for me,” she told The Epoch Times. “I will never fully understand what I am missing, but I will continue to speak in my twin’s honor.”
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